Luca (Hunting Her) Read online

  “You’re fit.” I pull myself over the bar and pause, waiting for her response. “Why didn’t you mention it when we were discussing the list?”

  She presses the treadmill dashboard again, creeping the pace higher. “I didn’t think you’d want to know the intricate details of how Luther liked his women in peak condition.”

  She’s right. That information isn’t welcomed. In fact, my anger spikes, the reminder of her captor spurring me to push out an additional two reps of pure frustration before falling to the floor.

  I slump onto the bench press, watching her, amazed by her.

  Tightness enters my chest and it has nothing to do with exercise and a whole hell of a lot to do with things I shouldn’t be thinking about.

  She decreases the pace for long enough to remove her sweater and throw it to the floor. Then she’s back running again, her oversized T-shirt billowing at her hips. It’s not enough to stop the display of her bouncing tits. Or to hide the hardness of her nipples pressing against the thin material.

  It’s times like this where I wish it had escaped my attention that she didn’t have any underwear in yesterday’s load of laundry. She has no visible panty line either. And maybe I’m daydreaming or living in a fucked-up fantasy, but I don’t think she’s been wearing underwear at all. Not now, and not since returning stateside.

  Fuck me for being the prick who noticed.

  I shove to my feet, needing an additional set of reps to drag my attention away from something that will get me killed. Something that’s a fucking dick move to even think about.

  She deserves better.

  Decker trusted me with her protection. He didn’t give me an all-access pass to ogle his sister.

  I drag myself up and over the bar, punishing myself, pushing so fucking hard my arms scream in protest. And still I can’t stop the imagery taking over my mind. Can’t drag my fucking gaze away.

  She’s completely oblivious. She keeps running, surpassing the mile marker to plow straight ahead.

  There’s never been a more remarkable woman. More powerful. More inspirational.

  I’m caught up admiring the perfection until I finally gain the restraint to drag my attention away. I stare out the window in front of her, wishing I had the power to give her a better life. To solve her problems.

  I’m stuck in the daydream of making her smile… until my gaze catches on her reflection in the glass, those dark eyes staring back at me.

  Shit.

  I force myself not to look away and announce the wicked shit filling my head. And I try even harder not to readjust my cock. To put the fucker back in his place—into deep, dark confinement far away from her, all while she keeps staring, keeps undoing me.

  “That’s enough for today.” I release the bar and drop to my feet. “You don’t want to push yourself too hard when I’m going to make you come back tomorrow.”

  Fucking tomorrow—the necessary vicious routine that will help her, and slowly kill me.

  “Yes, boss.” She thumps a hand against the treadmill dashboard, making the conveyor stop. “Same time, same place?”

  I ignore her sarcasm, too fixated on the nickname she gave me. If only she knew how bossy I could be. How demanding. How dominant.

  A man like me isn’t meant for a woman like her, no matter how incessant my attraction.

  “Same time, same place.”

  The music cuts off mid song as my cell starts to ring. Torian’s name is written across the bright screen while the device vibrates on the floor.

  “Are you going to answer that?” She steps off the treadmill and raises the long length of her shirt to wipe the faint hint of moisture from her face, exposing sweat-slicked skin.

  “Yeah.” I snatch the cell and connect the call. “What’s up?”

  “How kind of you to finally answer your phone,” he drawls. “Does that mean you’ve stopped holding a grudge over me sending you home?”

  “Still holding tight, asshole. What do you want?”

  He chuckles, the tone laced with aggression. “I thought you’d appreciate an update.”

  “I don’t need one.” I walk from the exercise room, leaving Penny alone, and continue down the hall to shut myself into my bedroom. “Decker calls me on the daily. He’s kept me posted on your progress in Greece. Progress I deserved to be a part of.”

  “And from the progress reports I’ve received, it sounds like you’re coping just fine in your cozy isolation,” he counters. “I’m told the role of protector suits you. Maybe a little too well.”

  Fuck Sarah and her big mouth.

  “What do you want, Torian? I’ve got shit to do.”

  A lengthy sigh travels down the line. “There are two things. First, I thought Penny would like to know your brother is returning the first of her friends home today.”

  I pause a beat. “Why are you telling me this? Why didn’t Benji call me himself?”

  “He’s busy. And you told me he struggles to handle his wife, let alone look after three rescued women. He’s also been out of range. But the process of returning them home has started, and I assume the information will be a relief to Decker’s sister.”

  I agree. Doesn’t mean I’m letting him off the hook for sending me home.

  “Okay.” I shrug. “I’ll let her know. What’s the second thing?”

  The conversation gains another pause.

  Another sigh.

  “You’re not going to appreciate this news.”

  I clench my fist, my impatience building. “So spit it out. It’s not like you have an issue with pissing me off. If anything, I’m sure you enjoy it.”

  “It’s to do with the kid and Keira.”

  The kid and Keira.

  The kid—meaning Tobias. The son of Penny’s captor, and the boy she helped raise. The kid she would claim as her own if she had the choice. And the child who is Torian’s half-brother.

  I cling tighter to the cell. “What about him?”

  “He arrived in Portland a few days ago.”

  “A few days?” I grate, trying not to let anger consume me on Penny’s behalf.

  “Yes.”

  “And you kept it from us, why?”

  “Because Tobias has come a long way since the death of his father. He’s doing well. But every time he gets on the phone to Penny he loses momentum. She’s dragging him down, and it’s best if they keep their distance for a while.”

  I huff out a derisive laugh. “You’re a fucking asshole.”

  “Am I?” he snaps. “Why? For protecting my brother?”

  “For having no fucking concern for Penny.”

  “She’s not my problem. She’s yours.” His usual sense of superiority enters his voice, the dictatorial aggression barely leashed. “I’m telling you out of courtesy and nothing else. It’s up to you if you inform her of the situation.”

  “In that case, thank you,” I drawl. “How fucking generous.”

  “Watch yourself. I’ve put up with your hostility for long enough. I’ve also let it slide when you don’t answer my calls. But I assure you, my patience is growing thin. I’m doing what’s best for everyone. Including Penny. Keeping her away from Tobias might be the push she needs to stop hiding with you when she has a family who would kill to know she’s still alive.”

  “She’s making progress,” I snarl.

  “Not fast enough.”

  I close my eyes and pinch the bridge of my nose. There’s no negotiating with him. He’s already made up his mind.

  It doesn’t matter that he’s keeping Tobias from the essential pain of recovery. Finding a way to support and communicate with Penny is part of the process. Torian just wants to make this easier on himself. Less drama. Less theatrics. Less trouble.

  I guess I’ve been doing the same thing. Not wanting to push Penny to leave the house or see a shrink all because I want to shield her from more trauma.

  “Fine.” I walk for my bedroom door and pull it wide. “Do whatever you think is best. It’s
too late to stop you anyway.” The kid is already here. Probably within a few minutes’ drive.

  “You’re not going to keep railing on me? I expected more of that aggressive, ex-SEAL defiance I’ve grown to despise.”

  My defiance has nothing to do with my previous life as a SEAL. If anything, it’s the cornerstone that got my ass kicked out. Rebellion and misplaced loyalty have caused me to fall so fucking far from grace that all I seem to have done over the past few years is descend.

  “I get it,” I mutter. “You’re trying to protect Tobias. And I’m going to do the same with Penny. I may have drawn the short straw this time, but I’ll deal. I always do.”

  “It doesn’t sound like you’re dealing. If anything, I’m hearing a hint of defection. I hope you’re not thinking of crossing the fence again.”

  There’s a threat in his words. The most subtle reminder that I’m no longer one of the good guys, whether I like it or not.

  “I’m dealing just fine. In fact, I’m even starting to think you were right to send me back,” I lie. “I deserve a break. Consider me on vacation until further notice.”

  6

  Penny

  I remain in the exercise room, tinkering with pieces of equipment, trying to teach myself how to use them while the barely heard mumble of Luca’s voice carries from somewhere in the house.

  Today’s achieved goal has already started to take effect. I feel lighter. The burden of darkness doesn’t hinder my vision like it has recently.

  I don’t know if it’s the endorphins or the decrease in cortisol, but the sensation is comforting. Strengthening. The voices in my head have been quietened.

  My feelings toward Luca are changing, too. I’m not sure where the subtle shift is leading. Yet I’m eager to get more of the enthusiasm I feel in his presence.

  I’d even lost myself while staring at his reflection in the window. I’d been in awe of his power. Both daunted and inspired.

  But then our gazes collided, his attention making me transfixed.

  Usually male scrutiny chills me to the bone. And for a split second, it had. The routine fear made its presence known. It attacked, hard and fast. Then it flittered away, the withdrawal an exquisite dance as a hesitant curiosity took over.

  I began to enjoy the way he watched me. The subtle hint of praise spurred me to run farther. Faster. I wanted more. Even craved it.

  “Want me to show you how to use the machine?”

  I spin around at the sound of his voice and pretend my heart isn’t lodged in my throat. “No, thanks. It’s a little out of my league.”

  “After that effortless run? I disagree.” He walks toward me, his stride confident, his posture tight.

  Everything about him intrigues me. Especially the secrets hidden behind those hazel eyes. It’s the slight hum of attraction that catches me off guard.

  I like the look of him. More than that. I like having him near.

  After everything I’ve been through—after all the handsome men whose charming smiles turned into deviant smirks—I should remain as far away from him as possible. I’m sure it’s imperative to my healing, despite my body attempting to make me feel otherwise.

  “Sit.” He juts his chin at the machine in front of me. “I’ll walk you through it.”

  “Seriously, I don’t—”

  “Just do it.” He comes up beside me, tall, broad. An effortless protective presence. “Sit your ass down.”

  My body obeys without mental consent.

  “This is for upper arms,” he continues.

  I scoff. “I figured as much. I’m not completely ignorant.”

  He grins, the flash of perfect white teeth increasing the hum in my belly. He leans in, adjusts the weights stacked to my left, then pulls down the dangling bar hanging above my head.

  “See how that feels.” He hands over the bar. “Keep your core tight and do as many reps as you can.”

  He steps back to sit on another bench as I pull the weighted bar down below my chin, then raise it again. He doesn’t watch me this time. He lowers his gaze to the floor and bends over, resting his elbows on his knees.

  There’s no comforting smile. No heated gaze. There’s nothing. Only a flat line of lips against a blank expression that makes me think he’s hiding something.

  “Am I doing this right?” I continue to work the bar, my arms wobbling under the unfamiliar exertion.

  “Yep.” He nods, his gaze briefly raising only to catch on my chest. His face tightens. Hardens. Then he glances away, his jaw ticking.

  I can’t help following where he looked, my cheeks heating when I see my nipples beading through the thin layer of my shirt.

  The bar slides from my grip. The weights clatter onto the stack.

  Luca shoots upright, his attention flashing to me as he frowns. “You okay?”

  I nod and slump my shoulders, feigning fatigue when what I’m really doing is loosening the material around my chest. “Sorry. I’ve never done arm weights. I didn’t mean to let go of the bar.”

  I didn’t mean to be sexually insensitive either.

  It’s just that I can’t bring myself to wear underwear. Not bras or panties.

  I’d dreamed of having those luxuries while I was a slave. I’d always thought I’d love the comforting feel of added layers of clothing after having the option taken away from me. But then I’d come here, and the dreams had come true, only to become another nightmare.

  I’d hated the restriction. The suffocation. The itch of something foreign against my skin.

  “Don’t worry about it.” He keeps his chin high, as if determined not to lower his vision. “We can try again tomorrow.”

  He holds out a hand and waits for me to stand. The offer is forced. There’s something different about him. Something has changed since he reentered the room.

  His eyes aren’t as kind. His shoulders are too stiff. He’s on edge, for reasons other than my appearance.

  “Who was on the phone?” I ask.

  Brief seconds pass as his hand falls to his side, the silence announcing where the shift in his emotion came from.

  “Torian,” he admits.

  “What did he say?”

  He sucks in a long breath, his muscled chest rising beneath his shirt.

  “Luca, what’s wrong?”

  He winces. “I don’t want to lie to you.”

  The admission is barely spoken, yet the words penetrate deep. “Tobias… Is he okay? Did something happen?”

  “No. Nothing happened to him.” He rakes a hand through his hair.

  “What about my brother?”

  “They’re both fine.”

  I breathe a little easier. “But something’s wrong… There’s something you can’t say…”

  He holds my gaze, his expression hardening. “I don’t want to keep shit from you. Problem is, wanting to protect you and also tell you the truth isn’t possible.”

  I swallow as a skitter of unease ricochets down my neck. I want to know what he’s hiding. I don’t want to add to his burden either. “I trust you’ll tell me anything I need to know when the time is right.”

  He huffs out a laugh and shakes his head. “You’re not helping.”

  I hate seeing him struggle. It’s strange. I never thought I’d consider or care about a man’s feelings after what the opposite sex put me through. Yet here I am, wishing he wasn’t battling whatever weight rests on his shoulders. “Luca, you always make the right decision where I’m concerned. I know you only want what’s best for me.”

  “Jesus Christ.” He drops back down to the bench, head hung, shoulders slumped. “Tobias is here in Portland.”

  My heart squeezes. Tobias. My beautiful boy.

  “He’s been here for a few days.” He lifts his head to meet my gaze. “Torian thinks it’s best if the two of you keep your distance.”

  That squeeze becomes a burn, incinerating me from the inside out.

  There’s pain. So much pain. But I knew this would happen. I p
redicted these people would snatch Tobias out of my life. I knew they would never want a constant reminder of their father’s crimes around the child I spent years raising.

  I knew…

  Only the knowledge didn’t prepare me for the consuming reality.

  “I appreciate your honesty.” I push to my feet and make for the door, needing to escape before my anger shows.

  “Penny, wait.” He follows. “It’s only temporary.”

  Lies. All lies.

  “Once you’re back on your feet,” he continues, “you two can catch up.”

  I keep walking, keep striding out the distance to the sanctuary of my room.

  “Penny, stop,” he demands.

  I don’t. I reach the bedroom and slam the door behind me.

  “Jesus fucking Christ.” He speaks through the barrier between us. “This isn’t permanent. Every time you speak to Toby, he gets depressed. He’s not coping with how you’re acting, and who can blame him? In Greece, you were a force to be reckoned with. You led him and he looked up to you because of that. Now, whenever you talk to him, it’s a two-minute, one-sided conversation. You can’t expect him not to be affected by that.”

  Guilt slams into me. Hard.

  He’s right. I barely talk to Toby and our conversations are always short. I’m well aware of how toxic I am in this current state. I’d been getting better, though. With Luca’s help, I’ve been improving. I just haven’t spoken to Toby recently for him to hear the change. Doesn’t stop me from being livid though.

  Cole Torian has no right making decisions for Tobias. No right at all. He barely knows the boy.

  “Penny?” There’s a thump against the door and I picture Luca’s heavy fist weighed against the wood. “Talk to me.”

  “There’s nothing to talk about.” I collapse onto the bed. “Maybe you’re right. He’s better off without me.”

  Another curse drifts from the hall, then he opens the door. “Don’t go back to the place you were in a few days ago.” His voice is harsh as he glares. “Not when we were finally starting to get a handle on this.”

  “There is no we, Luca. And there is definitely no ‘handle on this.’”